Better Days

So I'm definitely feeling so much better today. My husband's awesome and I suppose that has a great deal to do with it all. He is a wonderful spiritual leader, something that I really need--and the job God gave him in our marriage...BTW, he's trying to dig my nose as I speak. So I figured that I'm going to just get through the week and let be what may be. I just feel honestly horrible in regards to all the stress I'm putting on my students because of quarter assessment. I'm so distracted I'll finish this later...
It's later, over 24 hours later to be exact. So today my false worries and anxieties fall upon my house hunting adventure, which hasn't turned out to be much of an adventure. We've seen so many houses I've lost track already, and we've bid on about 6 or 7 houses. It honestly get's so discouraging. We're making almost $90,000 combined between the two of us and we can't get a house, can't afford to bid what other people are bidding and feel comfortable, like we can pay a mortgage at "that" cost and afford to live. It's so heart breaking at times. I have such high hopes and dreams, and I can't believe how easily I let them get shattered. I've recently learned that I've lost the ability to see the good in something when it's right there. We had a house that had no offers on it, but it was a little more than what I thought we wanted to spend--HUGE house though, so we passed on it. After contemplation and being turned down once again, I decided it might be a good option after all, but now there's been offers and we're back at square one, with nothing. Our lease is up at the end of November, I'm ready to move.
The neighbors (our roommates) are moving out before the lease is up. I'm fine with that. Brys and I can handle the rent on our own now, but I'm not sure if they realize that they need to help pay Octobers utilities in November (when they are gone) and they need to help pay for the cleaning costs once we move out. It burdens me to talk money with them. I think they think I act like I know it all. I know that I am quite knowledgeable ;-), but I'm no know it all, I do know that. I need to learn how to be more approachable maybe. I have some attitude problems once in a while or come off as cold when I really mean to be nonchalant.
Oh, so about those the assessment I was talking about above. I found out about a week and a half ago that the material I was covering--thinking it was what was on the 12th grade assessment--wasn't what is being covered. Therefore, I had to force my students to read all kinds of crap and not be able to really discuss it with them. So now I feel horrible because since I am the new teacher, they get the shit end of the deal. I feel like they won't get the education that they would have with any other teacher on campus. I feel so sorry for them. My poor kids. All I can do I suppose is try to make next quarter a better one. I need to stay on top of my game and teach everything that needs to be taught, the way it should be taught.
So those are my random thoughts for now...as I sit on the toilet, my sanctuary for the moment. TMI? Sorry, better days tomorrow. :-)